It’s been quite a long time since we found something weird around town worth taking a picture of and running in the paper. At long last, that drought is over, courtesy of this gem here.
During a stop into True Brew Barista last week, a call of nature sent us to the unisex bathroom. Upon entering, an alarming sign was posted on the wall, impossible to miss: HAVE YOU SEEN THIS KIDNEY?
We’ve all seen lost dog and lost cat (and lost bonsai tree) posters, but rare is the poster looking for a human organ. This particular poster promises a $500 reward for the return of said kidney. The creator of the poster was smart enough to include an accurate depiction of the missing organ, done in what appears to be pencil and pen.
The note reads: “Woke up on Feb 15th in a snowbank with my guts poorly stitched up. Yup: Some jerk had stolen my kidney. I need it back urgently. No questions asked. $500 reward. (*This illustration is my kidney, age 35. I’m now 58.)”
The poster of this poster also left an email address – gimmemykidneyback@hotmail.com. Being the hard-hitting newspaper that we are, we sent an email to that address, claiming we had found the kidney, hoping the recipient wouldn’t actually call our bluff. Within about 2 minutes of sending, an email came back. This was going to be a big deal. Surely the person got the email and desperately wants that kidney!
Instead, the email was from Mail Delivery Subsystem, saying the message was not delivered because the recipient’s email address could not be found, or is unable to recieve mail. Either way, it was a massive let-down.
As legendary Unsolved Mysteries host Robert Stack would say: Someone out there knows something – maybe it could be you!
For real, though – if anyone has any information about this poster, we’d love to hear the story. Send any tips – or found kidneys – to news@theconcordinsider.com. That email address actually works.
April 28, 2019
I got a chuckle out of this. Thanks!