“Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion.” That line from the screenplay Steel Magnolias was a favorite of Elsie Morse. Elsie was a teacher and newspaper editor by profession but she was so much more – a wife, a mother, a quilter, an actress and director. In her role as a director she quoted that line to her cast to show that even in a drama there is comedy, and the same can be said for life.
In 1994, Elsie’s daughter, Meggin Dail, and her husband Joel found out they were expecting their second child. They were going to a family dinner that night but had decided, as most newly expectant parents do, to keep their news to themselves for the first trimester. This would turn out to be anything but a normal family dinner. Elsie had gathered her family together to share the news that she had been diagnosed with breast cancer and would be beginning treatment. A cancer diagnosis – hard to deliver and no easier to receive. Meggin immediately turned to her husband and then blurted out, “we’re pregnant.” Sadness and joy, laughter through tears, they would serve Elsie’s family well.
Elsie felt that by sharing her story she could not only educate but relieve the burden. Why not talk about it? This was life, this was her life. It might have taken a dramatic turn, but there was going to be comedy, too. Elsie’s husband, Art, shaved his head when his wife lost her hair due to her cancer treatments. Elsie was none too pleased with her husband; she couldn’t understand why he would do such a thing. Meggin tried to explain to her mom, “it is simply because he loves you.” But Meggin also thinks it was an opportunity for him to open up a dialogue with people, an opportunity for him to share their cancer journey with others. Cancer is a journey that no one takes alone.
During Elsie’s cancer journey, she had participated in a women’s breast cancer support group, and with this group Elsie had participated in the American Cancer Society’s Making Strides Against Breast event in Concord. Meggin had participated in the event as an inpidual before her mother was diagnosed because she cared about the cause. Meggin later formed a team, because she wanted to do more, be part of something bigger than herself. Meggin had a great support group of friends, super friends she could count on. Their friendship gave birth to her team, Super Friends Fighting Cancer.
So what is a girl to do when she wants to raise money for the American Cancer Society to make an impact on breast cancer? The girl should do what she loves to do. Meggin, like her mother, is an actress and a director. Meggin had been performing from the young age of 7 and through the years she had been directed by her mom and even directed her mother in theatre productions. “Cabaret For A Cure,” it was sure to be a hit.
In September, Meggin produced the second annual “Cabaret for a Cure.” But this time the cabaret was in memory of mom. Everything was different. There would be no mom in the audience, as Elsie had lost her battle with breast cancer that had metastasized to bone cancer in May. Meggin contemplated not doing the cabaret, obviously people would understand. But would Elsie?
With her mom’s voice ringing in her ears, “you have to finish what you start,” Meggin decided the show must go on. With plans for the “Cabaret for the Cure” under way, Meggin attended the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer team leader kickoff. She learned that the American Cancer Society was marking its 100th birthday. So much progress had been made from the days when cancer was only spoken about in whisper. The American Cancer Society knew that silence can be deadly and only progress can be made when we make noise, when we take actions. Meggin was ready to make some noise. At the kickoff, volunteer director of teams Kathi Russ shared an African proverb: “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” Meggin was determined to go far with her Cabaret cast and her Super Friends Fighting Cancer Team.
On Sept. 13, the 2nd annual “Cabaret For the Cure” was held to full house at the Scenic Theatre in Pittsfield. They had to turn people away at the door. The audience was about to embark on the roller coast ride of life – with life comes cancer, and no one is immune. But they were going to laugh through tears, because after all, that was Elsie’s favorite emotion. Meggin took the stage in her most challenging role to date – for the first time she stood on stage as herself, Meggin Dail. She read, “Happy Mother’s Day,” a letter to her mom.
Meggin had dedicated the Cabaret to her mom. It was everything she had ever wanted to say to her mom, everything she thought her mom would want to teach the audience, everything her family had learned along the way through its cancer journey. When she had asked her cast to share something about themselves that she didn’t know, to her surprise they each shared their own connection with cancer.
Cast member Maye shared that her mother died of colon cancer when she was 27 and she never got over it. Maye’s grandmother was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 50; she had a radical mastectomy and lived to be 96. Maye wanted people to know that, too. Maye still battles the cancer gene today. When Meggin was asked if it was a perquisite to have a cancer connection to be in her cast, her reply was, “doesn’t everyone have a cancer connection?”
There were tears when Meggin took the stage and read her “Happy Mother’s Day” letter. In the letter, she revealed that she asked her mom in her final days, “is there anything I can do for you?” and her mom’s answered, “Do for me what I would do for you.” There was laughter when Meggin’s dad, Art, took the stage dressed from head to toe in bright pink. He asked the crowd, “Meggin said we needed to get loud in the fight against breast cancer, is this loud enough for you?” and then proceeded to auction off his loud pink pants to the highest bidder. Elsie’s friend, Nela Hobson, shared in her piece called the “Quilting with Elsie,” that “Someone once said ‘Our lives are like quilts – bits and pieces, joys and sorrows, all stitched with love.’ And isn’t that true?” The audience members nodded their heads in agreement. There were skits of practical advice about how you can help the survivor and the caregiver and skits about what not to say to a person that has lost a love one. Hard life lessons all made easier with music and laugher; life is bittersweet.
Meggin invites you join her team as they participate in Making Strides Against Breast Cancer on Oct. 20. You may not recognize them; like most Super Friends they don’t wear their capes on a daily basis and her Cabaret cast probably looks like the cast of characters in most of our lives. Making Strides allows all of us to stand together, through laughter and tears, strong and united – determined to finish the fight.
