Dear Casper and Bill,
I've been going to the same gym for almost eight years now and I love it. It's the perfect atmosphere; non-judgmental, not overcrowded, and near my house. Recently, I started working with a new personal trainer there. Working together as closely and physically as we do, I couldn't help but fall for this guy. We locked eyes when he was spotting me, he gently corrected my form with those strong hands, and I just melted. I want to get to know him better, but I'm afraid if I ask him out and he's not into it, it would be so awkward that I'd never want to go back to my gym. What should I do?
Dear Not to Worry,
Your future is secure in our hands. Rather than chancing a great relationship that could bring you happiness or misery here is our suggestion: Based on your description of those strong hands and his gently correcting your form, and you melting, we want to act as your personal guinea pigs and sacrifice our time and money for you. Let us get to feel his strong hands and correct our forms (we could really use some re-forming). Let's see if he can make us melt. It's been a long, long time – 30 years – since anyone else has locked eyes with us. Can this be the time? Let us do all the difficult training for you and get back to you someday in the long distance future. Maybe. Trust us please. Rush us all the details about the gym and the name of Mr. Hunk so we can begin our physical training ASAP!
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