My Dear Flock,
Why are you still here? You should be winging your way southward, like all the other Canada geese. If you hang around these parts you will be subjecting yourself to the bullets of hunters, the fangs of coyotes, the talons of eagles, the claws of bobcats and the carving knives of chefs. I am sure you know what happened on Lake Todd where your kin were euthanized by the U.S. Department of Agriculture Wildlife Services!
Although you appear to be like normal Canada geese, your lifestyle is very different because you do not migrate. Why don’t you go to flight training school and rediscover the art of migrating? Also, there are plenty of travel agencies eager to tell you how to find your way to the sunny South.
I do not want to offend you, and I must choose my words carefully. We do not like the way you leave your calling cards on our golf courses, tennis courts and beaches.
Simply stated, for many people you have worn out your welcome. I have your best interests in mind when I tell you it is time for you to leave.
The migration of birds over vast miles, without compass or maps, even for those that just hatched in the spring, is one of the mysteries and marvels of nature, The sound of honking Canada geese heading south is music to our ears. Why don’t you gather your friends in a V formation to join them?
In the September/October 2011 issue of New Hampshire’s “Wildlife Journal,” former New Hampshire Fish and Game commissioner Bill Carney of Concord explained the origin of non-migratory Canada geese like yourselves. He mentioned there was a time when Canada geese were domesticated to be used by hunters as live decoys, but this practice was made illegal by a law passed in 1935 at which time an estimated 25,000 to 35,000 domesticated Canada geese were set free. Carney wrote, “Today, more than 75 years since the release into the wild of the live decoy population, there are breeding resident geese in every county of New Hampshire.”
If you read Carney’s article carefully, you will see that your numbers have multiplied so drastically across the years that you are among 30,000 to 35,000 resident Canada geese living in just New Hampshire, to say nothing of the other northeastern states, and becoming “a nuisance in city parks and other grassy expansions.”
You should be forewarned that in a recent press release, Mr. Tom Gobble, the president of the “Society of Turkeys United” has announced a “Save our Necks Campaign” with the slogan, “Have a Canada Goose for Thanksgiving.”
Un-affectionately Yours, Paul Basham