Changes coming to downtown parking?

We are the last ones who like to spread rumors.

It goes against everything we stand for, but we just couldn’t resist.

There’s an injustice about to come down on this city and we don’t think it’s right. So we’re taking the proactive approach and getting out ahead of the story to drum up some discussion and hopefully, action. Now, we can’t reveal our sources – that would be unethical. To be clear, though, it’s not the possum from last week’s Insider. He was only visiting; it’s a mere coincidence he lives under City Hall.

Anyway, our source tells us there are big changes coming to downtown parking, and we’re not talking about the redesign. This is sooner and swifter. You think the cost to leave your car on Main Street is steep now? Just wait until Law 27745-36657 goes into effect April 1 (wait, that’s today!)

We’ve heard that prices will more than triple. What used to cost some spare change from your cup holder to park for an hour will now set you back $3. Can you believe it? And if that’s not bad enough, the hours of parking enforcement are being extended an hour on each end of the day, and will soon run from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. According to sources, it will also include Saturdays that land on odd numbers.

And when the redesign does take place, the new meters will actually print out parking tickets the second they expire. Say goodbye to the days of risking getting to your car before the nice parking patrol people.

We’d start tossing our spare change in a larger bucket if we were you, readers. Also, see page 7 for more information.

April Fools!!!!!!!!!!!

Author: Tim Goodwin

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